As I was sitting down to write this blog post, I had a golf tournament on in the background. Even though I don’t play golf, the game fascinates me because of the mindset required to consistently be a good golfer. This day, it wasn’t the golf match itself that was interesting. It was one of the advertisements.
I used to think that we were either born a perfectionist or we were not. Since I WAS a perfectionist, I thought seeking a life of no mistakes was a much better way to live. It worked pretty well for me for about 6 decades. I just had no idea how limiting it was. Falling off a horse in 2017 gave me the chance to live the cliché of getting back on the horse, which has given me a glimpse of a whole different way to experience “mistakes”. You’re not going to believe what I’m doing next.
I used to think that we were either born a perfectionist or we were not. Since I WAS a perfectionist, I thought seeking a life of no mistakes was a much better way to live. It worked pretty well for me for about 6 decades. I just had no idea how limiting it was. Falling off a horse in 2017 gave me the chance to live the cliché of getting back on the horse, which has given me a glimpse of a whole different way to experience “mistakes”. You’re not going to believe what I’m doing next.
It’s natural for us humans to avoid discomfort. I’ve heard scientists say that most, if not all, of our actions are designed to move us away from pain and discomfort. Others argue that we also seek pleasure.
As far as I’m concerned, it’s a moot point. We can all agree that we are just trying to feel better.
Scientists also agree that agitation is required for our brains to lay down the new neural pathways for learning.
But wait! Agitation is uncomfortable.
When I drove out of Mystic Waters the day after Easter, I saw a blue plastic bag hanging from the tree above me. With a quick glance, I could see that it was full of something heavy. Seeing trash on the ground is not that unusual. Seeing it hanging from a tree full of something mysterious got my attention, especially given what I thought I saw. “Surely not,” I thought as I drove on to my next appointment.
There’s a story about the way elephants are tethered when in human captivity. A simple chain or rope around one leg is tied to something that does not match the strength of the adult elephant. If he chooses, he could easily break the tie and be free. However, when he was a young elephant, he learned that it was useless to fight such restraint. By the time he’s grown up, he remembers not his strength, but the uselessness of the fight.
I went to a “galloping clinic” (yes, on horses!) this week with Stevie Delahunt, so I knew I would not have time to write a new blog. Instead, I scheduled a “rerun” of the blog below before I left. Little did I know that the clinic would show me both how far I’ve come –
There’s a story about the way elephants are tethered when in human captivity. A simple chain or rope around one leg is tied to something that does not match the strength of the adult elephant. If he chooses, he could easily break the tie and be free. However, when he was a young elephant, he learned that it was useless to fight such restraint. By the time he’s grown up, he remembers not his strength, but the uselessness of the fight.
There’s a story about the way elephants are tethered when in human captivity. A simple chain or rope around one leg is tied to something that does not match the strength of the adult elephant. If he chooses, he could easily break the tie and be free. However, when he was a young elephant, he learned that it was useless to fight such restraint. By the time he’s grown up, he remembers not his strength, but the uselessness of the fight.
Imagine for a moment being composed and unflappable in the face of every behavior that might set you off. Getting fired. Being discriminated against. Told you are a failure. Not being allowed to speak. Expected to follow the pecking order. Expected to comply while your boss loses his composure in dramatic and threatening ways. Any one of these acts would interfere with most people’s best version of themselves. Yet Elizabeth Zott keeps her composure as her boss’s frustration escalates, offering a clear picture of what being unflappable really looks like.